You work out of a Hotel?
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize