The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
The air was thick with penises
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Randomize
