new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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