Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize
