But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
She said her name was "party"
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
