You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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