yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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