He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
