Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
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