This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
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