it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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