Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Randomize