You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
