Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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