On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize