I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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