Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
he was CRYING into my vagina
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
