And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
worst night to have a conscience
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Randomize
