okay pat passed out under dana's car
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
