so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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