i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
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