I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I need a beard to bite.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
tell me about the eggs
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