I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize