You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
