rhymes with "ouble enetration"
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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