But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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