Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
