I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
