idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Be still, my beating vagina.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
sex in a hospital.. check
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Randomize
