maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
