i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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