Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Nicole vs. Life
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Randomize
