My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Randomize