I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Randomize
