Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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