It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
You need a sexual gate keeper
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Randomize
