is your mom at the bar?
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
