It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
you didnt know i had herpes?
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
