carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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