Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
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