Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize