Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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