four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
