Girls should come with a carfax report
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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