I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
