If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
it was like eating out sand paper
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize