You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
