Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
