You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
