Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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