I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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